Bill Hulet Editor


Here's the thing. A lot of important Guelph issues are really complex. And to understand them we need more than "sound bites" and knee-jerk ideology. The Guelph Back-Grounder is a place where people can read the background information that explains why things are the way they are, and, the complex issues that people have to negotiate if they want to make Guelph a better city. No anger, just the facts.

Friday, April 2, 2021

Weekend Literary Supplement: The Climate Trials, Part Twenty Six

In this instalment we learn a bit more about the right-wing media and the Elders.

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Wayne was just as sanguine this time around. “We were specifically escalating in this dry run---but not unrealistically so. Tylon Talon really is an aggressive, obnoxious, fool, and the actor was doing a very good approximation of his methods. I liked the way you jabbed back instantly over the religious attack. I’m not sure that Talon would have hesitated like that actor, though. He’s really intelligent and has thousands of hours of tearing progressive voices to pieces.”

“Having said that, you do have the benefit of being someone who knows your subject like the back of your hand. Moreover, you don’t come from a position of privilege, so you know how to fight back instead of just crumpling or exploding when faced with someone playing dirty. I do think that your understanding of theology really is a nice card to keep in your deck. Generally, people on the left know nothing at all about religion. Even more useful is the fact that the vast majority of conservative Christians---and the people who ally with them---also know almost nothing about it. If you can sound like you know a lot and have some sympathies for church-goers, you can peel away a significant part of their rhetorical arsenal.”

“I do have a suggestion though---if you can remember it in the heat of the conversation. When someone like Talon throws a lot of fast-talking ‘what abouts’ at you, it’s often effective to turn his aggression against him. Don’t try to talk as fast as him, just deflect the question---preferably with a joke at his expense. You had the start of something like this when you said that there were a lot of questions. But you can’t telegraph this jab. You need to toss it off very economically and ambiguously so the producer monitoring the five second delay won’t weed it out. I’m not expecting you to come up with something on the fly. We’ll work some more with the actor so you can come up with a few snappy answers in this particular situation. I’d like to not have to do it, but this really is a tried and true way that the wingnuts take advantage of liberals and I think we should at least try to counter punch against it.”

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Mikhi went to the Holy House the following week and asked the conclave in the basement about how the Elders were able to find and fund such an enormous number of experts in such a wide variety of fields.

The tall, thin, elderly black man was the first to respond. “First off, most of our people have businesses and personnel that they put at our disposal when we need them. So whatever infrastructure you see is generally just being “re-purposed” from something much more mundane.”

The very white, elderly woman with very thick, frizzy hair in braids then spoke “More importantly, we have made it our job to carefully search out the ‘lost talent’ that our culture routinely squanders. The thing to understand is that only a tiny percentage of people who have incredible abilities ever get a chance to use them for the good of society. Everyone’s heard of Phds driving cabs and MDs mopping floors. But those are only the tip of the iceberg that is especially visible because these folks have diplomas that they can point towards.”

“For every one of these people there are thousands with equal expertise and creativity who lack some irrelevant other quality that means that they never get the chance to share their special talents with the world around them. Think about all the great works of literature that are languishing in the hard drives of shy authors who don’t have the connections to tell them how to market their work. Or brilliant students who can’t afford college, or get stuck with a crappy primary education, or have parents who are so dysfunctional that all of their energy goes into survival instead of learning. There are enormous numbers of brilliant, creative people who spend their whole lives grinding away at jobs they loathe because society just stupidly threw away their potential.”

The middle-aged Asian woman who managed the Holy House stepped in. “It isn’t hard to find these people if you try. And the Elders have the resources to help specific individuals take advantage of their potential. Would it be any wonder that most of them are willing to ‘step up to the plate’ and help out when they can?”

Mikhi stepped in at this point. “That raises another point. Where is all the money coming from for your infrastructure? Even this house had to be paid for, and this isn’t a cheap neighbourhood.”

The older Asian man with tired-looking eyes answered. “We aren’t adverse to using theft of funds as a way of dealing with problem individuals or organizations. For example, when that unfortunate individual tried to to kidnap you, we dealt with him by stealing a huge amount of his money, and, then made it look like the contractors he’d hired took it. The resulting war led to his quick demise and the end of the contract against you. What money we need comes our way through such situations.”

“Besides, most of the people working for us are unpaid other than whatever help we might have given them in getting on their feet in a world that treated them like crap. They are grateful and more-than-willing to help. Moreover, one of our three key values is frugality. We are careful with our money and have amassed a significant contingency fund that we can use when necessary. The Climate Trials is only one of many current projects---but it is one of only a few truly expensive ones. The rest are really quite cheap.” He smiled---and may have even winked---at Mikhi.

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Moreover I say unto you, the Climate Emergency must be dealt with!

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